News & Media Updates


Trans Chasers – Difficulties in the Dating World

Dating for Transgender Individuals

Dating for Transgender Individuals.

It might not be easy for any of us to put ourselves out there and start dating. But for dating for transgender individuals can unearth a whole different set of complications.

One such issue is discussed very openly and honestly in this article by Christin Scarlett Milloy is trans chasers. These are cis-gendered ‘admirers’ who specifically target gender diverse individuals, objectifying them and seeking sex with trans bodies. They don’t see the fascinating complexities, which make transgender individuals who they are. They don’t see them as people who are worth falling in love with. Sadly trans chasers exist. As if dating wasn’t tough enough.

But let’s be clear, this is an insightful piece, not one to vilify all cis-gendered people who may date a transgender individual. There are, thankfully, genuine and good souls out there too.
Milloy explains it eloquently,

Who exactly am I calling out when I use the C-word? I don’t mean cis people who are willing to date a trans person when they meet someone they like, and I don’t mean all trans-attracted people. I’m referring to individuals whose primary motivator in dating is that they really, really, really want to “be with” a trans person, one with original anatomy intact … to the extent that other interpersonal concerns are neglected and ignored. They don’t care to know us very well; they just want to date us. Date us so hard.

While we need to draw the distinction between genuine interest and ‘chasers,’ the last thing we want to do is cultivate a fear of dating. Think of this article is a realistic, practical guide for dealing with those rare people who see a gender diverse identity as an object. Check out the full article here: Trans chasers, exploitive admirers who harass trans people.

Danny King - Sydney Transgender & Diversity Counselling

Born As A Girl

Danny King is 31-year-old upholsterer with blond hair and a ginger beard.

He’s a loving father to a two year old, and he was also Born as a Girl. Eleven years ago, Danny King had an operation that made a big difference to his life.

Of course, that’s not where the story ends. Danny King is one of many inspiring transgender Australians, featured in The Daily Life article, Born as a Girl. It’s an insightful discussion around gender diversity, and interestingly it addresses addresses the growing visibility of female-to-male transsexuals.

The distinction between a woman and a man may seem simple on the surface, determined by genitals. But even on the biological level, sex is more complicated than this. There are chromosomes to take into account, and hormones. Then there is gender, the sex a person feels they are in spirit, which may be different again. Science offers no conclusive answers as to why some people feel themselves to be one sex when their bodies tell the world something else. Genes might play a role, as might the hormones a baby is exposed to in the womb. And though, when hearing the word “transsexual” or “transgender”, the public imagination may conjure visions of men becoming women, in reality much of the traffic at the frontier of gender politics is headed in the opposite direction: biological females are becoming men.

Our own Anthony Carlino was called in to comment as an expert in this article. He highlights the many challenges faced by young people and their families as they come to terms with gender diversity. We think the full article is well worth a read – you can find it here if you’d like to check it out.


Parenting & Transition - Anthony Carlino

The Gift Of Transition

Parenting & Transition

Children need love and acceptance. These are universal needs which are important to a child’s healthy development. So what does it mean for Parenting & Transition? If you’re struggling for acceptance yourself?

It’s not an easy path. But in a world where there is incredible pressure to conform to the ideals held by others – and that included gender ideals – the decision to transition has in real wisdom, and it deserves acknowledgment.
Our own Anthony Carlino examines the complexities of parenting & transition in this article from The Star Observer.

“One of the most saddening beliefs I have heard transgendered parents communicate is that it may be in their child’s best interest to withdraw, as a parent, to protect a child from transphobia.

It is important to acknowledge that this belief comes from a yearning to protect one’s child. Often the parent has experienced transphobic violence themselves and, well aware of the pain and hurt it can cause, seeks to shield their child from this. It is a genuine attempt to support a child which can have long-term ramifications for that relationship.”

It’s a beautifully insightful piece (if we do say so ourselves). So we thought it was important to include – take a look at the full article here.

Gender Identity

The Transgender Conversation We Had To Have

Talking Gender Identity with Andreja Pejic

International model Andreja Pejic is trailblazer, inspiring countless discussions around gender identity. She was the first model to star in Jean Paul Gaultier’s men’s wear and womenswear shows in Paris. Now she also has a film Andrej (a) documenting her life and transformation into a woman. She’s also a role model for thousands of young people.

That’s where we begin with The Transgender Conversation We Had To Have, an article from The Herald Sun. Discussing Gender Identity with a young Melburnian who has just met Pejic. It’s a great read, and of course our own Anthony Carlino was asked to comment in the article. He describes what it means for a transgender individual to transition.

“Besides getting used to the changes in the body, I think anyone who understands the process
of transition knows that it is a psychological one,” he says.

“With many of my clients this becomes the final stage of self-acceptance, because no matter how many surgeries you have you are never going to be born in the body you truly want, you will never be biologically the sex that you want to be. That can be a real struggle for people to come to acceptance with.”

Carlino says a small number of people have gender reassignment surgery in Australia, but the majority go to Thailand, where it costs between $15,000 and $25,000 for male to female surgery.

“It varies because some girls will go over there and they will want facial feminisation and they will want boobs. It depends how much they want to get done,” he says.

We like the fact the Herald Sun had this conversation. They focused on real life individuals, rather than confining their discussion to theory. The full article is worth a read, take a look at it here.